Chapter 11 · America the Beautiful

Sour Tea

The server who drank Grandma's tea just to prove it was rancid

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It was a long drive that took us through Ohio, Kentucky, Indiana, Illinois, and Missouri before we finally arrived in Arkansas. This was the first time I had seen the Great Plains in the Midwest. The land was so flat driving through these states that you could see for miles, nothing but farmland. It was truly amazing. One of our stops along the way was to see the Gateway Arch in St. Louis, Missouri. Grandma had to detour us through the inner city of St. Louis, pulling the camper through rush-hour traffic. We got to see the Arch and even stayed for lunch, but I’m not sure either of us would ever say that traffic was worth it. All the while, her arm was in a ton of pain.

In Kentucky, we stopped at a hotel for the night before continuing on. Grandma didn’t have it in her to set up or take down the camper with her arm still in excruciating pain. She needed a break from driving and to prop her arm up with ice, so we spent an easy evening at the hotel. We even found dinner at a nice steakhouse within walking distance of the hotel.

Our server that evening was a young girl, probably a teenager like me or in her early twenties. She politely led us to our table and took our drink order of sweet tea with lemon. Our server was prompt with the drinks, which was honestly not difficult since we were basically the only patrons eating at that hour. It must have been sometime between lunch and when the seniors started the dinner rush.

Grandma squeezed her lemon and took a nice taste through her straw. As soon as she swallowed her sip, she grimaced in disgust.

“What’s wrong, Grandma?” I asked.

“This tea is rancid,” she said, looking for something to rinse her mouth with.

We called our trusty server over for a new glass of tea, explaining that the unsweetened tea had gone sour. Just to confirm, she picked up Grandma’s glass and took a swig right from the straw.

Our mouths dropped in disbelief.

“Oh,” she exclaimed. “You’re right! It’s sour!”

She made the same disgusted grimace as my Grandma, then quickly took off to get her a new glass of tea, leaving us sitting there stunned that our server, a complete stranger, had just drunk Grandma’s tea.

Even weirder, she had done it so nonchalantly that it seemed perfectly normal for her to drink other people’s tea.

Now, my family waves our flag of weirdness proudly, claiming our eclecticism, but that girl serving us that day went down in our hall of fame as one of the weirdest people we’ve ever met.

To this day, Grandma and I still recount, in total disbelief, the story of our server who drank her sour tea to confirm how bad it was, laughing just as we did back then.